Teen Sex

I just had sex and loved it, but now I think I am pregnant and I am only 14 and DO NOT believe in abortion. What should I do?

Any sexually active female should be seeing a gynecologist. First intercourse is an indication to begin annual Pap smears and pelvic exams. So, the first thing to do is make arrangements for an appointment with a gynecologist. Given the circumstances, she will likely test you for pregnancy (if enough time has passed for such tests to be accurate or she will arrange for one later) and she will test you for any sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) including HIV.

You also will want to talk to her or another adult that you trust about your partner. At 14, you are below the age required to give consent for sexual intercourse, in most states. If your partner is an adult, especially if there is a large age difference between the two of you, sexual activity with you is not appropriate thing for him to be doing. Many teens feel that the older their boyfriend is, the more adult they are. Or they are turned off by the awkardness and immaturity of boys their own age. Still, sexuality should be shared between equals, and though it may be hard to accept young teens cannot be equal in a sexual relationship with an adult. Doing so often causes emotional harm that young teens may not realize at the time. A large percentage of teenage pregnancies are a result of relationships with adult men.

Your doctor will also discuss your future plans for intercourse. Having unprotected sex can lead to a whole lot more than just an unwanted pregnancy. Sex can be a lot of fun but unsafe sex can leave a woman with STDs that may permanently affect her health, her future sexual activity, and her ability to ever get pregnant. Use birth control! And use a condom if there is any risk of contracting an STD or HIV! You can go to your local women's health clinic (Planned Parenthood has chapters all over the country) and ask to be tested, get free condoms, get birth control, and explore your options if you are pregnant.

Sex will only continue to be fun if you learn to take care of yourself first. Sex can also include just about a thousand things beside intercourse, from oral sex to masturbation, and if you and your partner aren't ready to have sex in a way that keeps YOU healthy maybe it's time to slow down a bit. If you choose to go back to abstinence, strange as it may sound, this too requires some planning. You want to think about what kinds of situations might lead to intercourse and avoid them or think about what you will do differently.

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